Some conversations stick in my mind from years and years ago. I remember sitting on my couch with a friend while our kids toddled at our feet, and my friend was sharing a story about her husband and she said, “He just wants me to be happy.”
I laughed. I thought she was kidding.
Fast forward a handful of years and I was away with three of my closest friends and I was recalling a recent incident where I had been standing by my thermostat trying to cool it down by waving a piece of paper at it and begging Jesus to make the number go down, moments before my then-husband was supposed to come home, as I had it turned up higher than he liked and forgot to turn it back down in time.
They all looked at me, stunned.
I said, “What, you guys don’t do that?”
They shook their heads no and one of them said, “I’m pretty sure my husband would just want me warm and comfortable in my own home.”
I thought she was full of BS.
And one time, I was with a girlfriend shopping, and she was updating me on how her husband and marriage were and she said, almost in passing, “He just cherishes me.”
I started crying right there in the scrapbook store.
Clearly, my normal was so far from center and yet so completely ingrained in me that I honestly thought all those friends of mine were in the minority.
Because I’ve not just met a man who adores me and treats me well, but now that we’re planning a wedding together, I have been very, freakishly, pleasantly surprised.
Me: “Honey, how much input do you want to have in the wedding plans?”
Tall-Shadow: “As […]